I've learned the hard way that there is peace in being still and quiet, letting God cover me and not everything else. It turns out I'm not alone. The Children of Israel had the same problem, and God had to teach them just like He is teaching me.
I've lost count of how many times I ran away from God's protection and guidance only to find myself dragging my wounded soul back to Him. The very thing I figured would protect me and take care of me was what imprisoned and abused me.
The Children of Israel did the same and believed turning to Egypt for protection was better than staying in alliance with God.
God called them stubborn children. I don't know about you, but I felt that smack down in the depths of my soul. I've been that stubborn child who runs to my own 'Egypt' for protection.
Alcohol, relationships, career, drugs, sex, family, entertainment, hobbies, furthering my education, 'living my best life'...all the things I turned to for protection with my life rather than God. I figured these people and things would mask my issues, deliver me from my insecurities and fears, fill the voids in my life, make me a better person, cover my sins, and drown out God's voice when I wanted to live my life on my terms.
Now ask me how that turned out for me.
About as good as it did for the Children of Israel. They traveled through harsh and dangerous lands and gave their riches for protection only to find out Pharaoh could not or would not give them what they needed in the end.
So God said, "Therefore shall the protection of Pharaoh turn to your shame, and the shelter in the shadow of Egypt to your humiliation...Egypt's help is worthless and empty; therefore, I have called her "Rahab who sits still." Isaiah 30:3 & 7
Everything I turned towards for help only took from me and made me worse. My pharaohs caused anxiety, stress, dysfunction, humiliation, heartbreak, health issues, loss of finances, and personal shame.
When we place more faith and trust in other things rather than in God, yes, He will allow your family and loved ones to become a snare in your life. Yes, God will allow that career or pursuit of education to become overly stressful, and the results could be a loss of a job you sacrificed so much to gain, or that degree you earned will be worth only the paper it's printed on. Yes, He will allow that dream home and car to become the biggest headache to maintain.
God doesn't allow this because He is mean. Yet, just like a good parent who already warned their child many times, God allows us to "see for ourselves." I didn't want to hear God's truth. I didn't want to place my trust in Him. I didn't want to wait for His guidance. I carried all that I was into the hands of everything else. Therefore, I learned the hard way that no person, place, or thing can protect me, save me, cover my sins, bring me peace, and comfort me the way God can.
God is a jealous God, and He will not be mocked. He will not allow His children to believe there is something or someone more important, wiser, influential, or powerful than He is. The sooner we accept that, the better off we will be.
God is still working on His stubborn child. I am yielding more and more as I walk this Christian journey. It really is a humbling process. I'm so thankful our God is longsuffering and forgiving because I need it everyday. Truly, His mercy endures forever.
My story for God's glory.